He wrote he wants to kill my son.

I got a phone call from my girlfriend sounding pissed. The cops had called her first. After reassuring her that no one was hurt. He told her that our son was in an altercation with another student.

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A=my son, J=the other kid, Z=third kid (All kids are in 3rd grade)

From the cops point of view. ~11:15 am

A gave the substitute teacher a letter that said “I want to kill myself” and on the other side it said “I’m going to kill you.” A said J gave him the letter. He took the kids out of the room and separated them so everyone is safe. But he just wanted to let us know what was going on.

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No Job Equals Less of a Man

I wonder if it’s just me who feels like half a man? I have a Bachelor’s degree in Business Administration but no job. It isn’t like I’m not getting interviews either. I’ve probably been on 10 in the last 2 months. Suited up, practiced and even studied some of the openings so I could have a leg up during the interviews. And I’m pretty sure I’m not bombing it on the interviews either.

You might even say it’s because of place but I’m not living in a big city but thirty thousand isn’t just a small town either. It’s rated one of the best small towns to live in the USA, ranked #5. Maybe its a numbers game? 100 jobs in a city of 30,000 looks good but 100 jobs in 3,000,000 looks like a crap shot. Am I wrong though, should I be having better luck finding a job?Charlie Jobs

This non stop going and interviewing and still not coming up with a job is putting some weight on my shoulders that I try not to show my family. But at times it feels like I can’t support my family and it cuts to the bone. I feel as though I can’t ask for any time off, or time to hang out with an acquaintance.

I want to leave my kids a great example to follow as a man but not being able to find a job is a huge disappointing example. The father/man I had raise me always had a job. Whether it be warehouse work or construction work. He even had a job as a drug dealer until he was no longer around. This is who I based my understandings of being a father on.  Continue reading

Buying my son his first Tool/Knife

English: A multi-purpose pocket knife with all...

English: A multi-purpose pocket knife with all the blades visible (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I want my son to know that we acknowledge that he is growing up and to celebrate it we decided to get him a pocket knife. Which turned into a multi-tool because the pocket knives all looked really sharp and were about 5 inches long at Wal-Mart.  So just like the Berlin Wall a big NO from my girlfriend, till we saw a Winchester Multi-Tool.

I don’t know much about brands except Gerber, Bear Grylls and Black and Decker, but not much about toughness of tools. The only thing I really know about tools is that you get what you pay for, buy a quality tool and you only have to buy it once.  But in this case it’s not the brand of tool but more the act of relieving  the tool. Maybe even in his head its more of an understanding that he is becoming a man. Continue reading

The Things a Stay at Home does

Not one person has said it but you can see when they say “you stay at home with your kids?” , that they imply that your kinda of a mooch for not having a job. That in some part of the conversation they feel like it’s sleep all day and play video games, the never-ending college dorm days.

My job at home is never-ending. Last time I had a day off was in the beginning of March when my mother stayed with us for a few weeks. Other than that MAYBE once every two months. Those are the days my girlfriend takes the kids for the day to another city to go shopping and I get to stay at home. Which is just either playing, usually shooting games that my kids can’t watch me play. Or hear me talking into the headset since the first and ONLY incident.

The incident was when I first got the PS3 and headset and decided to say a few words and in the middle of the words I saw that my son was watching. I caught myself before he heard something that wasn’t suppose to hear and hear me say “Mother of……” then quickly came the word “dog!”. So now when he is playing a game or gets hurt he says “Mother of dog”. Yeah that one was my fault, I’ll take all the blame on that one. On the bright side it gave me a great way of learning that I need to watch EVERY thing that comes out of my mouth.

There are things I wish I could do for hours at a time without getting into trouble or being a bad father. I would love to play video games, watch TV, go out drinking, champagne beer pong, have a hobby, pretend to like sport, hell SLEEP IN but most of my time is spent taking care of two guys who just want attention. It’s an all day thing. If one’s not hungry the other one is. This messes with their nap times also since one is eating and the other is just playing. So it’s a constant feeding time.  But the few times that they both fall asleep at the same time I get to read things on my computer but then it’s Mission Impossible around here. Sneaking around trying to do things that aren’t loud or jumping over the parts of the floor board that creak when you step on them. This can go on for up to three hours. Those days are almost the greatest unscheduled breaks where I can be off of father duty.

Most of my free time goes into future planning: birthdays, school registration, teaching my children everything, college requirements, apartment finding, shopping list, car maintenance, doctor appointments, check ups, all other kinds of fun things to do with the family, and working on and keeping the budget. Yes I do all of that. Even though most of my ideas for gifts, lessons, shopping list, and fun things for the family to do get shot down with playful negativity. I still think of great gifts for her father because he’s only been given gifts from four daughters for the last 26 years. The lessons I teach my son are sometimes harsh ones but I was raised in a more harsher way of getting hit when you did something wrong. I am not so quick with spankings but more of the harsher father doesn’t approve of voice and no playing 3DS for a day punishment. The fun things I mention to her are not her idea of fun, going to a Monster Truck show or going to watch a WWE event or riding a motorcycle. But we do more free family oriented things, which is still very fun.

So most of my day is on a hectic hurry to make others happy and also to make sure that when my significant other gets home that I can solve as many of our problems as possible.

P.S. She had a bad day yesterday at work and came home upset so tonight we decided to scare her when she got home.

It was creepier when he was smiling.

This is how we cheer up mom

Budget talks with the Girlfriend

Once in a while my dear sweet girlfriend/mother of my children gets all huffy and puffy from work and decides to take it out on me. I know it’s not about me it’s more about work frustration then anything else.

Just as in most households the most talked about subject in relationships in money, and just like a snowball it gets better worse from there. Now I would like to stop for a second and let you know that these “discussions” are just that. Not fighting, just us talking in a healthy fashion about what worries we have and how we can fix those worries. I believe this is what you call maturity relationship discussions.

This thing about these little discussions happen a little too much almost at least once a week. Which isn’t bad because I think it’s brought on by the fact that we are on a tight budget but not at the point where we have to pinch pennies, but also not at the point where all of our debt paid off . What’s great about it is that it helps us teach our children about not wasting anything. We don’t go into detail about finances with our sons but I explain things to him about waste. Not to take a bite out of an apple and say that he doesn’t want it, like his mother.

It makes me feel almost as if I was the bad guy waiting till she gets home to give her the bad news or bills that have come in for the day. Or worse the house snitch, telling on my sons behavior all day.  But to tell you the truth she’s horrible with keeping a schedule or budget so I really don’t mind keeping track of things if it helps us all out.

Fatherhood Sucks

It came to me the other day as I was stuck taking another cold shower, sometimes it sucks to be a father. Whenever my family has to go somewhere and everyone showers guess who job it is to get the cold shower that’s left over. It’s almost a weekly ice bath that I am the lucky recipient of. No thank yous or I’m sorrys just hurry up dad mom wants to go. This is just one of the many rewards I get for being a dad.

Even ice cream can be taken away from me with a simple p-p-please. Of course not the whole ice cream but the bite at the end of the cone where the chocolate is at. I understand what Rodney Dangerfield meant by “I get no respect.” It sometimes makes me laugh when I think about because it was my favorite part to eat as a child. Even then I had to hurry up and eat it before something or one of my brothers would try a plan to get it from me. Continue reading